Twenty Months Already

I may not be the greatest person and I may not be the sweetest girlf for you but one thing for sure; I'll be by your side I'll always be with you and I promise you that. I didn't mean when I said I want to give up, it's just the time was very tough and you made it tougher for me. But then I realised I need you like you said you need me. Remember the olden days? when we were in the same school, what you and i did everyday until the end of school. We had fun and your jokes make me laugh every single day, I admit you are the best part of my day. But now it seems so different and you know it. I realised that difference, and that makes my days tough since we are far from each other. That makes me want to give up, but the memories make me stop from thinking that we won't be long together. The memories. They are like the rope for me to hang on , still hanging on this realtionship. I trust you I believe you don't you ever make me laugh out loud and pretending like I'm okay while I'm crying inside. Now it has been twenty months and I'm glad we're still hanging on. I know we will be okay, I know we will be alright just be ourselves like before. Be happy like before. Happier, maybe. 143, forever.

Your Call

Waiting for your call, I'm sick call, I'm angry call, I'm desperate for your voice. I'm listening to the song we used to sing in the car. Do you remember, butterfly, early summer? It's playing on repeat... Just like when we would meet. 'Cause I was born to tell you I love you, and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine. Stay with me tonight.

Merdeka Eve

Happy 51th Merdeka, hooray! I wanted to go online last night but i was too tired and slept. Yesterday i went shopping with ibu and my sisters to buy their new clothes for this coming raya eve. I had to keep an eye on Aisyah, my youngest sister because the rest were so busy shopping and i had to be the babysitter for awhile. Haha, it was fun, though. We finished shopping at night and we decided to go to Dataran to see the fireworks. Luckily I brought the camera. The fireworks are beautiful, I always like fireworks. :) The people there was very happening and happy to celebrate Merdeka, 51th Merdeka!

access room

yes, im in the access room right now. haha we're supposed to go to prep hey, who cares. tomorrow im going back home, yeay! i miss you shidi, i really do. Hihi, im kinda bored right now. want to online in myspace, but its blocked! sheesh. im going online twenty-four hours at home for sure. today school kinda sucks. my exam results sucks, especially my accounting subjects. im not meant to be an accountant kot? Haha, okay, gotta go. im surfing the net. Off Off!

Visual Look, that's Visual Kei

I'm browsing some visual kei bands and i'm like WOW. at first i thought they were scary, but hey that's kinda cool and i really like it. if i'm not mistaken, visual kei is about a band that express their music through their dressing, but that doesn't mean their songs are not good. their songs are great, but they express more through their dressing, and that's visual kei!

*i know i got a weird taste in music but i really like visual kei bands

Went To Alam Sentral

Ibu wanted to go there, she wants to buy a new handbag and she just got it! Good for her because I cannot stand to wait her choosing a handbag that suits her, she took a long time to make a decision. Finally she got a new handbag. Hooray. Well, while I was looking at the purses and bags, there was this guy, Roslan Shah kot. He kept saying 'meletup' when he saw interesting stuff to buy. Hahaha I laughed quite hard actually when he came to my mother and said ' ohh meletup handbag ni akakk' . I hope he doesn't hear me laughing like hell. -.-' But seriously, it was hilarious.
Actually I wanted to follow ibu to buy stuff to bring back to hostel. Only ibu and I went into the store while my three sisters had to wait outside because they were eating ice-cream and they were not allowed to come in. The guard at the store was like 'adiiik adiiik makan kat luar ehhh, makan kat luar'. Haha after paying at the counter, we went home. Well, all of us were quite tired and right now I'm the only one who did not sleep yet. So, this house is in silence since I didn't switch on the television. Overall today was okay, nothing interesting or what except I already gave the shirt I bought for shidi to him. Oh! and the ipod too. please take care of the ipod i beg you haha. Okay, goodnight.
*Im breaking the silence with Antic Cafe songs. Toodles.

I Wanna Be A Rockstar

Yes, I do. Being in a popular rock band and going on tours with the band members yeah that's so cool. Playing a guitar maybe? Or the vocalist? Nah, my voice kinda sucks. I don't want to be like Mariah Carey or Jessica Simpson that's not my..taste kot. Haha, I Wanna Be A Rockstar!

selamat hari jadi, ayah !

hee hee, sorry im late at wishing you so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY. it has been a while since i met you a few weeks ago. truly i am missing you each day, you are the greatest father in the whole universe even when you pissed me off sometimes. haha with the babbling and whatever, well, biasalah, kata ayah kannnn. hehee, i love you, ayah.

just swallowed some pills

now i feel better, don't remind me of your bad side.

of melancholic and mayhem

it hurts in the inside, why can't i just let you go so that i wont hurt you anymore.

but i just can't. you always be my pills to swallow when i feel down and depressed. i need you, really. please tell me you'll stay. and silence, please go away because i hate you, silence.

you don't know

12.19 a.m.
im not sleepy at all.
what should i do? urgh

*it has been 1 year and 7 months since the first day we're together and i'm happy with you, although you broke my heart but naah, im the one who are being emotional so, swallow the fact, love. and im sososo sorry if i got mad at you, i didn't mean it, really! im just..pissed off sometimes but you always got me everytime i got pissed off with you, i really can't get mad for a long time because you make my day. XOXO to you, mr plump guy. thanks for being my indie rockstar muahahahahah :P

a silent love

From the very Begining, the girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.

Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How deep is your love for me?"

As the guy is not good with his words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As for him, he only endure it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?"

The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leave, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realised that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......

The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.

During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.

With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying....

The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.

A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead.

When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.

small reunion

i went to mid valley with alin today. ijat and alin were there too. i got tired when we arrived because we search for the toilet but we can't find it. alin made me so confused . haha, alin got so hyper and made us follow her wherever she wanted to go. you know it's like you are a following a little kid who was so excited to go to a mall. she went here and there and we're like 'alin, chill mannnnn'. we enjoyed ourselves, but the movie was like the most boring part of the day. we watched star wars/clone wars or whatever it is. the movie sucks man, but it's the only movie that started at 3. i was like so bored in the cinema and went crazy in there, we're the loudest in the place. haha after 30 minutes we went out and can't stand the boringness of the movie. farid and arep didn't want to leave (they liked it, i guess).



*i have quite a great time with shidi, i miss him tho. ;(
*and oh ! alin, i miss you too, of course, we had a great time! :)

betapa susah nak tangkap gambar dia ni -.-' macam artis pula

haha you guys rock!

the picture of all of us, the girls

hahaha, rock on bebehhhhhhhhhhh

dahiyah, happy birthday to you

i enjoyed going to her house, all we did was eat and played games. very tiring games i tell you. haha i miss you, bestfriends. :)

things are changing

i don't like the change.

cancelled our plans

i just got two sms from my friends about the silat tournament. they said we are not going to the silat tournament because of some reasons. auf was the first person who told me the news. i thought he was kidding. but then he said its true. a few minutes later, syasya called me and said about the same thing ; we are not going to melaka. i asked cikgu for a confirmation and cikgu said he can't find a bus to take us there and some other reasons. he said 'jangan risau gamebanyak lagi'. i was quite sad, we practiced every day to get ready for the tournament, but its okay. there's nothing we could do. the school sucks, they dont even support our silat club , i asked about the transport, whether the bus school can take us to melaka or not but puan zabedah(i dont like her) didn't approve. i dont know whats the problem eventhough our club brings gold medals and some of us went to sukma. whatever. i called syasya just now, she said the guys were sad about the plans that had been cancelled. i know they practiced hard, im sad too. but its okay you guys, we could participate a competition next time. :) cikgu epit will support us. and your holidays will not burn just like that, so, happy holidays you guys !


**i would share a video with you guys, although im not the one whos in the video, this is the category that im involved in silat ; jurus wajib puteri
**take a look and drop me some comments :D

updates

i went to my cousins wedding last night, the suboh family arrived at ara damansara, 8.30 p.m. the ceremony started at 9.30, i yawned a few times actually while waiting the bride. Haha, kak evi was beautiful that night, she was like a doll. her wedding gown was white in colour and she held a bunch of red, fresh roses. Kak Evi dressed like a princess last night. I enjoyed being at the ceremony. I don't have a camera that time, so yeah there's no picture picture of her. I'll try to put it here later. :) Oh Btw, last night Cat Farish was there too, with his wife. Hee, it was amusing when pak long said he wanted to take a photo with cat farish. Cat was right about to left, and pak long 'eh bob, nak tangkap gambar sekejap nii haa' BOB? Hahahhaa tak menahan gila

Right now i'm waiting for izyan to pick me up. i have to go back to hostel today. Hm, lately, i started to hate my school homeworks. Teachers gave us tough projects, and right now there are tons of homeworks that i didn't finish yet. urgh,
about my silat training? it was okay. i had to go to the field every evening and yes i was absolutely tired after the training but i can't sleep during prep because there will be teachers in the school at night to watch us doing our school homework or doing some revision. Heh. Last wednesday was terrifying. One of our seniours in silat broke his little finger and what surprised me was .. I can see his bones ! Yes the finger bone ! It was too horrifying, but his reaction was not like he was hurt, he can still laugh and that was fucking weird. He had to be taken to hospital and the doctor had to operate his finger to put it right back where it is. Eww, I can't even imagine if i was him, having a broken finger but still laughing. What the? EWW

Hayley Williams, you rock !